Thanks For the Memories (Even Though They Weren't so Great)
by Pineapple Moon
Summary: Jess freezes at the base of the stairs at the sound of Liz's voice calling out to Luke. Trying to remind himself to breath, he stays out of sight behind the curtain, willing his feet to run back upstairs. Sequel to Reserving Judgments. Fourth installment in the series


Jess learned from a very early age that weddings are the worst. Something about weddings are just a magnet for drama. It's like one giant cosmic joke. It's supposed to be a happy day as two people merge their lives together, but in reality everyone is stressed and short-tempered with everyone else. You spend months and months planning every little detail, but somehow it all falls apart anyway.

It might be the booze. Free booze around a large group is never a good idea.

As a kid, he had to bear witness to his mother's weddings three times, each one progressively worse than the last. Hell, the last one he just swiped a bottle of jack at the beginning and just hid on the roof with a book until he couldn't read the words on the pages anymore. That marriage only lasted until his hangover wore off.

The Jackson and Sookie wedding went surprisingly smooth, at least for the bride and groom. (Aside from the kilt ordeal, but honestly that was hilarious. It was the right amount of crazy for a guy who likes to talk to his fruit and a woman who thinks that's cute)

Everyone else on the other hand, had a terrible, horrible time. All things considered, he probably had it the least worst out of everyone in a shocking turn of events. Luke forced him to wear a tie, threatening to make him wash the truck and all the windows of the diner if he didn't. After a ten minute screaming match, then a walk around town to cool off, he returned with a counteroffer that he wear the stupid thing for the ceremony, but at the reception he could take it off. The second the I Do's were said he was already undoing the knot.

From the way Emily was complaining, it was the end of the world that she got a pity invite to the wedding, which according to Rory was true, but Lorelai kept insisting that she's being paranoid. Richard was in the same boat as Jess, where he'd rather be literally anywhere else in the world than here. Taking pity on him, Jess silently hands him an extra book he brought in case this thing went long and the two read in silence on some deck chairs that were on the edge of the party.

And it hurts his brain just trying to unravel the mess that is Lorelai, Rory's father Christopher, Rory herself, and Luke. Apparently, Christopher was going to leave his girlfriend to get back together with Lorelai, which Rory was really psyched for and made Luke in an even worse mood than usual. Then, the guy finds out the girlfriend is pregnant and just takes off before the vows could even be said.

Now Rory is all mopey as she packs for her trip to Washington DC that she has to go to with Paris since they won their school election. Jess is lounging on her bed, flipping through some of her cd's.

"You could help, you know." She grumbles as she tries to pick between two dresses.

"I am. You gotta have the right music to relax to if you're gonna be stuck living in a room with Paris for six weeks straight." She holds the dresses up to him, unable to make a decision. "The blue one."

"Thanks. And trust me, I didn't want to do this either, but then Paris was talking about how good it'll look to Harvard-"

"Ah, it's a Harvard thing, say no more."

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Have you thought about what you're gonna do after high school? Narrowed down what schools you're gonna apply for?"

"Easy, I'm not going to college. Hey, if I make a list, think you could go to Lane's and get some cd's? I think she has some that will be perfect for the flight down." Rory stops packing and stares at him. "What? She has a better selection than you."

"Why aren't you going to college?"

Jess groans. "Because it's not my thing. Can we drop this?"

"What do you mean, not your thing? You sit around talking about books, that's totally your thing."

Jess rolls his eyes. "Guess not." He mutters under his breath. "Look, Rory, I'm bored enough at school as it is. Why would I pay money, something I don't have a lot of, to sit around being bored?"

Rory sits on the edge of the bed. "But it won't be like that at all, I swear. Of course high school is boring for you, you're too smart for it to be any challenge. In college you'll be surrounded by smart people, it's going to be so much fun."

"Sitting in a room full of nerds. Pardon me if I don't jump for joy, bad back."

Rory slaps his leg with a pout. "Fine, I'll drop this if you promise me you'll at least think about it."

"Ugh, fine, I'll _think_ about it."

Rory smiles. "That's all I ask." She jumps up, going to her closet again. She pulls out two tops, holding them out. "I've looked at so many clothes I can't tell a difference anymore. Which one?"

Jess refuses to look up from the cd's. "Just because a majority of the town thinks I'm gay doesn't mean I actually _am._ I ain't one of those Queer Eye guys."

Rory stomps her foot. "But Jess…"

He sighs. God, he's gone soft since he moved here, or at least since he met Rory. "The orange one."

She brightens up instantly. "See, was that so hard?"

"I'd rather be pushed in the lake again. Why are you having me help you with this anyway? Isn't this something you usually do with your mom?"

"Normally, yes, but she's swamped at work. Someone thought it would be unique to do an eighteen year reunion next week and everyone waited until now to make all the reservations."

Jess does some mental math and groans. "Please say it's not for Stars Hollow High."

Rory shrugs. "It's the only high school in town. Why?"

He ignores her question. "And it's for the class of 1984?"

"That's eighteen years ago, so yeah. Why? What's got you all squirmy?"

Jess lays his head back and presses the palms of his hands into his eyes. "Liz is part of the class of '84."

"Oh. Well, do you know if she's coming? Has she called or anything?"

"I haven't gotten so much as a smoke signal from her, but that's how Liz has always been. She never plans ahead, and on the off chance she does, she won't ever inform anyone else, no matter how involved they are as well. She told me _the night before_ that she was sending me to come live here. Just came into my room, handed me a bus ticket, and told me to start packing."

"Wow, I had no idea." She sits back down. "Want me to check with my mom to see if she's on the reservation list?"

"Nah, she won't be on it. If she comes, she'd just stay at one of her friends' house." He nudges her with his foot. "Thanks though."

"No problem. Now," She claps her hands. "Onto pants."

Jess throws his head back with a groan.

Jess spends the next few days hyper vigilant of the phone, waiting to see if Liz calls with news that she's dropping in. He's pretty sure that if Luke had answered at some point when he was out that he would have told him by now. He's always trying so hard to build Liz up on a pedestal as some good mom, even going as far as lying that time over winter break in some weird way to try and spare his feelings that she never called. Jokes on him, Jess stopped being hurt over her every misdeed _years_ ago.

At least that's what he tells himself when he freezes at the base of the stairs at the sound of her voice calling out to Luke. Trying to remind himself to breath, he stays out of sight behind the curtain, willing his feet to run back upstairs.

"Liz? What're you doing here?" Luke sounds surprised, but happy to see her. That makes one of them.

"To see my two favorite boys, of course! Where's Jess at?"

"Upstairs sleeping. A friend is spending the summer in DC so last night they had a movie marathon thing as a big farewell. I thought I'd let him sleep in today. He's right upstairs if you want to go see him, I'll be right up as well."

Jess stops listening right there. He can't go back up now, so that only leaves the option of the back door that leads to the alleyway. As silently as he can, he slips through the door and makes sure it doesn't slam behind him.

That part out of the way, now he needs to figure out where to go next. They're going to know he's missing any minute, so he can't stick around here. Lorelai's is out of the question, Rory's not there anymore and Luke will probably call there first anyway. Lorelai would never lie to Luke about this, so he needs someone that will take his side on this. Between Lane and Dean, Lane would be the more understanding of the whole get away from the crazy mother part, but there's no way he could get past Mrs. Kim. Dean's a little more risky, him being against lying, but at this point he's out of options.

To Dean's it is then.

Dean makes his way upstairs after finishing breakfast. He closes his door behind him and does a double take at the figure on his bed. "Jess?! Wha- _how?_ I was downstairs the whole time."

Jess looks up from one of Dean's magazines. "Hey. You really shouldn't leave your window unlocked, it's not safe."

"I _do_ leave it locked."

"Do you? Do you really?"

" _Yes, I-_ You know what, I'm not having this argument right now. _Why_ are you here?"

"Wow, is that how you treat your guests?"

Dean shoves Jess's shoe clad feet off his bed, making him sit up. "No, but my guests come through the front door like a normal person, not through the window like a burglar."

Dean's phone starts ringing and when he checks the caller ID Luke's name comes up. He glances up at Jess, who's jumped to his feet. "If it's Luke, please tell him I'm not here. Please."

Dean lets out a sharp exhale as he answers the phone. "Hey, Luke." Jess starts biting his lip. "Oh, um, no, I haven't seen Jess. Yeah, I'll call if I see him. Bye." Dean flips his phone shut.

Jess slumps his shoulders and lets out the breath he was holding. "Thank-"

"Why did I just lie to Luke?" Dean cuts him off.

"Because you're a good person that's loyal to his friends?"

"Try again." Dean says in his no nonsense voice.

Jess sighs, slipping his shoes off so he can put his feet back on the bed. "Liz is in town."

Dean sighs as well, slumping onto his desk chair. Jess has been pretty tight lipped about his past, but from the few things he's mentioned and the things Luke has let slip, it was far from great. Hell, Dean still has to subtly nudge Jess to eat from time to time. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jess lets out a sarcastic laugh as he turns a page in the magazine.

He doesn't know what he was expecting, it's like pulling teeth to get Jess to talk on a good day. He wishes Rory were here. She's always been better at reading his moods when he gets like this. When he was in the kitchen alone with Lorelai last night she had joked it was because they were both fluent in twinspeak. At least at the time he thought she was joking, but now he's starting to think she was onto something.

"So," Dean changes the subject. "You never told me how the second Friday night dinner went. And now that I think about it, you never told me how you got on Richard's good side the first time. He _still_ doesn't like me."

Jess sets the magazine down, smirk weak but back in place. "Well, it helps I'm not dating his granddaughter."

"Oh, is that all?"

"That, and I told him the _Catcher in the Rye_ story."

Dean throws his hands up. "C'mon, man, that's cheating. No one can resist that story, it's gold."

"Emily must be inhuman then, because she didn't so much as crack a smile."

"Next time we'll double team them. You distract Richard and I'll take Emily."

"Oh, yeah, that's real funny. There's no way in hell I am ever going back to one of those dinners."

Dean shrugs. "You've entered the Gilmore zone. Next thing you know, you'll be wearing tuxes and have to remember which fork is the salad fork."

Jess throws the magazine at Dean. Dean lets him, glad his mind is off the Liz issue for now.

Around five, Jess unfortunately has to leave his safe haven. Dean apologizes over and over again as Jess climbs back out the window, saying it completely slipped his mind that him and his family were having dinner in Hartford. Jess waves him off.

He figures he could kill an hour in the music store and then see if he could stay there with Lane as she practises the drums after hours. By the time that's done, Liz will be off partying like usual and away from the diner.

With a plan firmly in place, Jess makes his way down the street to the music store. Of course, because his luck is the crappiest thing on the planet, two blocks ahead he spots Liz leaving the diner with a group of friends and heading straight his way. With nowhere else to go, Jess curses under his breath as he ducks into the store on his right.

And because the universe gets a real kick out of making him miserable, the store had to be the back door to Taylor's stupid market, with the stupid man himself right by the door stacking shelves.

Ignoring Taylor's protests, Jess crouches down under the window with his back against the wall. Taylor looms over him with his hands on his hips. "This is a place of business, _not_ a hiding spot. Go take your shenanigans somewhere else."

"Did you really use shenanigans unironically? Because I haven't heard that one in a while." Jess can't help but say.

"I don't have time for this, I'm calling the authorities and _they'll_ escort you out and into a jail cell where you belong."

Taylor starts for the register where the phone is. "No, wait! Please, just- I'll leave in a minute, I promise." Taylor pauses, but still looks suspicious. "Look, I know you don't trust me and my word is worth squat to you, but, I just _really_ need the place to hide for the moment. Please, I promise I didn't do anything illegal, I'm just avoiding someone."

Jess holds his breath as Taylor studies him. "Fine." Jess sighs in relief, laying his head back against the wall. "But the second the coast is clear you are gone."

"Got it, I'm a ghost, I was never here."

Taylor huffs as he silently gets back to work. "Since you're on the ground, make yourself useful and stock that bottom shelf." He grumbles a moment later.

Jess nods, shuffling forward a little. He wordlessly does as he's told, not wanting to push his luck and get kicked out.

"So, anyone in particular you're hiding from? At the very least I can tell you when he or she has passed so you can be on your way."

Jess straightens out a can so the label is facing forward, debating how much to give away. "My mother's in town. I'd rather skip the happy reunion and fast forward to the part where she runs back off to New York to find her next _true calling_ as a pet psychic or something equally as stupid."

"Oh, I didn't know Liz was back in town." Taylor's expression looks about how Jess feels. "She was always the more… eccentric one."

Jess scoffs. "You didn't have to live with her for seventeen years, she's as nutty as a fruitcake."

"True, but I did watch her grow up. After her mother passed, William spoiled that girl to the core."

"Really?" Jess asks. Both Liz and his uncle have always been pretty tight-lipped about stories of them as kids. "It's just, from what Luke's told me, his dad always sounded kinda strict, making him work in the store every day after school."

"With Luke he was, but never Liz. Cathy always took care of her and afterwards he was so over his head that he just let her do as she pleased." Taylor says off-handedly.

Jess lets that sink in. That sounds an awful lot like how Luke first treated him when he first arrived here in Stars Hollow. He let him go as he pleased, bought him whatever food he wanted (despite how unhealthy it was), and he just let him do whatever, whenever. Then he did a complete one-eighty, making him eat all his gross food, stopping him from smoking, even getting him a stupid phone so he could always know where Jess is at all times.

Jess sighs as he pulls out his phone, turning it back on. He has half a dozen missed calls from Luke and even two from Lorelai. And shocker of all shockers, not one from Liz. Luke left a few voicemails and he hesitates before pressing play.

The first one is pretty standard, just wondering where he is and telling him Liz is in town. The next one Jess can tell he's trying to rein back his temper as he curtly tells him to call him back right away. The one after that is a little more interesting.

" _Fine, I get it, you're avoiding your mom, but would you at least give me the common courtesy of calling me back so I know you haven't been mauled by a bear and you're not laying in some ditch somewhere. Bye."_

Guilt naws at his stomach after that. He bites his lip as the final voicemail plays, wary of what Luke has to say next.

To his surprise, the last message is from Lorelai, not Luke. " _Hey, kid. You really need to call Luke back, he's making Nixon in his final hours seem like a calm, collected dude in comparison. And before you roll your eyes and grumble about how I have no idea what's going on, I'd like to remind you that you've met my mother and I have a little experience in the whole avoidance gig. I just want you to know that it's not fair to Luke that he's guilty by association with your mom, you shouldn't ice him out too. I'll let you go now, just, please call him? At least to lower his blood pressure?"_

He feels even worse after that. It never even crossed his mind that Luke would be this worried about him not calling back. This is Stars Hollow, nothing ever happens here. His chalk outline prank made front page news.

"Hey, Taylor?" Jess asks, chewing his thumb nail.

"Hmm?" Taylor doesn't turn away from the shelf.

"Is Liz gone?"

Taylor turns, looking up and down the street. "Yeah, she's gone."

"I'll make myself scarce then." Jess gets to his feet, planning on going back to Luke. "Thanks, uh, for the place to stay."

"Yes, well, this was a one time thing, so don't expect a repeat. Oh and, Jess," He turns back to Taylor. "Not that it's any of my business, but from the sound of things, you should call Luke."

"You're right, it's _not_ any of your business." Jess storms out the front, slamming the door extra hard on his way out. Who does Taylor think he is, telling him what to do. Stupid, nosy, busybody sticking his nose in everyone's private business. If he wanted advice, he would have written to the Dear Sally column in the paper.

With his mind made up, instead of going forward to Luke's, Jess turns and heads for the music store, turning his phone off again as he crosses the street.

It's eight-thirty when Lane has to head home from drum practise. Figuring he has to face the music at some point, Jess makes his way to the diner. Peeking in the window, he sees only Luke wiping down a table with fever. He debates sneaking in through the back before tossing that idea out. Luke's already pissed enough as it is, he would go nuclear if Jess didn't at least check in.

With one final moment of peace, Jess strides into the diner, hoping Luke doesn't make too big of a deal out of his disappearance today.

Hoping being the key word.

As soon as the bell above the door rings, Luke's head shoots up. "Where the hell have you been? I've been calling you nonstop."

"Out. Around." Jess doesn't make eye contact, making a beeline for the stairs.

Luke rushes forward, cutting him off from his only exit. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"A watch doesn't go with this outfit, Daddy." Jess quotes in his best valley girl accent.

That throws Luke off his game. "What?"

Jess rolls his eyes. "Alicia Silverstone from _Clueless,_ nineteen ninety-five. Seriously, you've known Lorelai for _how_ long and you still don't understand these references?"

Luke recovers faster than he thought, crossing his arms. "Where have you been?"

"Why do you care? It's not like I'm some little, helpless kid."

"I _care_ because I'm your guardian and if something happens to you while under my care then it's my fault! You didn't even give me a heads up that you were leaving, Jess! I had no idea where you were all day! Do you know how worried I was?!"

That knot in Jess's gut returns in full force. He focuses on a point behind Luke. "I didn't think it was that big a deal." He mumbles.

Luke hangs his head as he sighs. "I'm a worrier, Jess, it's what I do."

"I know."

"The whole point of you having that phone is so I don't worry."

"I know." Jess repeats.

"Then why were you acting like that kid from nine months ago that just got off that bus? Does having your mom around really make you that pissed?" Jess shrugs, staring down at his shoes. He's not really angry, but he doesn't know how to put into words how he's been feeling all day. Luke takes his silence as a confirmation. "Okay, I'll do all the talking for the both of us. You are grounded for a week."

Jess nods. "Fair."

Luke doesn't hide his shock that Jess gave in without so much as a fight. "Good, start by putting the chairs up on the tables while I count out the register."

Jess does as he's told. He hates having Luke think he's angry, but he struggles to find the right words. All too soon, Jess is finished with his job. He hovers downstairs as Luke finishes up.

"I'm not mad, or pissed at Liz. I got over that a long time ago." Jess finally works up the will to say. Luke pauses what he's doing and shifts his eyes up, waiting for Jess to continue. "I guess I'm just scared."

Luke barely heard that last part, not sure if he heard him correctly. He's _never_ heard Jess admit to being scared of anything. He sets down his pad of paper, giving Jess his full attention. "Scared of what?"

Jess sighs, fidgeting more than normal. "I don't know, I just… I don't, I don't wanna leave."

Luke furrows his brows. "What makes you think you're going somewhere?"

"It's what Liz does. I've been dragged to and from more places then I can count. This is the longest time I've ever been in one place that I can remember, and I like it. This town is crazy and wacky and all the residents belong in an insane asylum, but… I don't want it to end."

Luke leans forward on the counter. "I thought you hated it here, you've never been quiet about your opinions of this town."

Jess shrugs. "Maybe before, but…" He pauses, trying to find the right words. "Last week I helped Rory pick out her music and what to wear in DC. I spent the whole day today at Dean's and then a few hours hanging out with Lane, and I've come to realize that if I left tomorrow, I'd miss them. I'd really, really miss them."

"Yeah?"

Jess nods. In for a penny, in for a pound, he thinks. "And I would miss you, and working in the diner, and whatever bit Lorelai chooses to do in the morning, and even arguing with Kirk over his bill, I'd miss it all."

"Okay."

"Okay?" That's it, nothing else? Jess makes a giant fool of himself and all he can say is okay?

"Jess, you know I always want what's best for you, and if you think it's staying here then okay. I will do everything in my power to keep you here."

Luke makes it all sound so easy, the little pessimistic part of Jess can't help but poke holes in Luke's plans. "What if she wants me to go back to New York with her when she leaves? As much as I hate to admit it, she's my mom. Legally speaking, she can take me whether you like it or not."

Luke doesn't hesitate. "Then I'll try to convince her that this is where you need to be, that it's where you _want_ to be, and if that doesn't work then I'll take her to court if I have to. And if _that_ doesn't work then we wait for your eighteenth birthday in the fall and you can come back on your own. What I'm trying to say here is that I'll always fight for you, I'm always in your corner, but I can only do that if I know what's going on in that head of yours. I've told you before that you gotta talk to me. I can't help you if you're shutting me out all the time."

"Okay, I'm sorry. I was real stupid today."

"Yes, you were." Luke agrees. "But at least now I know why you pulled such a stupid stunt."

Jess grins. "Does that mean I'm not grounded anymore?"

Luke grins back. "Nice try." He turns back to the register. "You better get to sleep, you have to get up pretty early tomorrow to help me with the morning deliveries."

Jess groans. "But those are at like, five in the morning. Can't you just ban me from the tv and lock me in my room like a normal parent?"

"You _like_ being alone in your room with a book. This is supposed to be a _punishment,_ hence doing the thing you dislike, like getting up before the sun. Which reminds me, your phone."

"What about it?"

"Hand it over." Luke holds out his hand.

"You just said you got this for me so you would know where I am. How does that work if you're the one that has it?"

"Like how it helped me so much in tracking you down today?" Luke points out. Jess is annoyed that Luke makes a good point. As much as he hates cell phones, he still doesn't want to just hand his over, it's the principle of the thing.

"But I told Rory I'd call her tonight to see how her first day was. She's all alone in a strange city with only Paris as company. How do you think she'll feel if I don't even call her when I said I would?" If there's anything Jess has learned from Lorelai, it's that Luke will always cave in an argument as long as you bring Rory into it.

Luke huffs. "Fine." Yes! "You get five minutes, look at me. Five minutes. That's it. The second I get upstairs you will be off the phone, or I'm adding on an extra week. Are we clear?"

"Crystal." Jess heads for the stairs before Luke can change his mind. He hesitates at the base of the stairs. "Hey, Luke?" Luke hums in acknowledgment. "I just want you to know, I appreciate everything you do for me. I know you weren't exactly thrilled about having me thrown into your life like this, and I didn't make it any easier, but…" Jess trails off, losing his momentum.

"I get it. I wouldn't have it any other way." Luke clears his throat. "Now, go on, you're wasting your five minutes being sappy with me."

Downstairs, Luke can still hear Jess talking to Rory after the five minutes are up, but decides to give him another few minutes by finding little things to do around the diner. A small knock comes from the door and he opens it to find Lorelai.

"Hi."

Luke moves aside to let her in. "Hey." He pulls a stool down from the counter so she has a place to sit. "Want some coffee? I can't say how long its been sitting here, but coffee's coffee to you."

"Sure, thanks." He grabs her a mug and pours her some. "Judging by your calm exterior you found your wayward teen." She comments as she takes a seat.

"He was hiding out at Dean's. Now he's upstairs talking to Rory. It's his last phone call for the week so he's probably milking it for all it's worth." Luke pauses. "He, uh, he was scared his mom was going to change her mind and take him back to New York with her."

"So he thought if he never saw her while she was here then he'd get to stay." Lorelai connects the dots. "Do you think she'll do that? He's still a minor and she's his mother, it's in her power to do that."

"I honestly have no idea. Jess made the same point and all I could tell him was that I'd try and fight for him to stay here. A blind man could tell this is the best place for him, he has a close group of friends, his grades have gotten better, he's been staying in school. He's stable here."

"It's his home."

"Yeah, I guess it is now." Luke shifts gears. "So, how are things at the Inn? Liz was saying that the reunion was all a bit last minute."

Lorelai groans into her coffee. "That's putting it mildly. Michel has been running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to make sure everything runs smoothly, and to make it worse I'm stuck coordinating the wedding from hell. You've heard the term bridezilla?"

"Yeah?" He says hesitantly.

"Well, she makes the average bridezilla seem like a calm, rational person in comparison."

"Ouch." He opens the donut case and hands her one with a napkin in sympathy.

"Normally, I'd have Rory around to pick up the slack, but she's in DC for the next six weeks meaning I need to hire someone, but the catch twenty-two, I don't have _time_ to hire someone because of the stupid wedding."

"If you want, Jess is always looking for ways to make some extra cash. I'm not sure how much help he could be, but-"

"Can he answer a phone and use a computer?" She asks.

"Yeah."

"Then he's hired."

"He's helping with some deliveries first thing in the morning, but I can have him over by around eight tomorrow."

Lorelai sighs in relief, taking a huge bite. "Thanks, Luke, for the food and the help, you're a lifesaver." She wraps the rest of the donut in a napkin and sticks it in her purse for later. She finishes off the coffee as she stands. "Seriously, you're the best."

"Yeah, yeah, I bet you say that to all the guys that give you free food." Luke jokes as he takes the empty mug.

"Night, Luke." Lorelai says softly with a smile.

He gives her a rare smile of his own. "Goodnight."


End file.
